So I started in on The Small Print (version 1) the other night and I am so… full of feelings about it. Many feelings. I am impressed by all the work it took to make it a real, physical thing that I can hold in my hand. I’m impressed by the hard work and love that went into crafting each of these stories. I’m in awe of the incredible imaginations and talents of the people who wrote for this. I’m totally turned on by a lot of the content.
And I’m also kind of jealous?
I USED to fancy myself a size writer back when I was first finding out about size kink (circa 2012) when I was so full of excitement that this was A THING and people were WRITING ABOUT IT and I banged out a few stories of my own of… questionable quality. I’ve dabbled a little bit in writing sizey stuff for myself the past few years, but I would REALLY love to be able to create something truly GOOD and have it featured alongside my fellow size freaks.
I think it was about 2 years ago that I was “going through some stuff” (when am I not? jeezus christ…) that I started on a sizey piece about my MILF therapist. I just looked it over and… wow. It gave me some Feelings (TM). But I legitimately think it’s got Good Content potential, and I’d love to work on it some more, but… I don’t know if I can. It’s just really emotional for me and also SO autobiographical that I don’t know if I’d want someone else to read it? I have no “OCs.” Most of my “characters” are just me. I AM MY OWN MUSE. And that can be… fucking difficult.
sz journey 
Caveat: I am not a professional writer nor do I aspire to become one. If that is your goal, seek their advice.
Like any other artist, size creators start out wanting to create something that they don’t see represented in the world. That’s the only motive or inspiration you need. Everything else is accreted after the fact.
The decision to share one’s work with others is different for everybody and is highly contingent upon many factors that can vary greatly over time and place. It is perfectly valid to share some things and not others, to share with a limited audience, or to change your mind about sharing.
The only guideline that I have followed that has kept size writing fulfilling for me is WRITE FOR YOURSELF FIRST. I am the one who judges it, and I have to be satisfied by it before any other consideration. Call it pride or vanity, but anything else is just doing someone else’s job (for which I will demand payment).
If you decide to share something, there’s nothing wrong with hoping it will get widely viewed, “liked,” or receive approving comments. You must not, however, make that your reason for writing. You must find the heart to believe that your own judgment is both necessary and sufficient. Everything else is wind.
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Thank you, Olo.
I WANT to write for myself primarily but… it’s always nice to have someone else read something you’ve written and say “this is good!” (I live on positive attention.) I don’t think I would ever, like… go around asking people what THEY want in a story and trying to write that tailored to their interest–even for money. I just don’t think I would have the “inspiration,” my heart wouldn’t be in it and that would make it less good and not a good experience overall.
I think what I actually want is to have a partner to share these really intimate and really emotional things, and I just don’t have that. I honestly might–here we go again–bring this up in therapy, but not necessarily tell her that it’s about her. Or maybe do tell her. Who knows.
I appreciate your ongoing support. ❤
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